It was super scary to decide to record and post a youtube video. Just commiting to the idea of producing youtube videos was a huge step. I watched so many youtube videos that hyped it up, but still the fear lingered on – it still lingers – and I’m scared of getting scared to produce videos again. But here we go, last year I wished for myself that I would gain the courage to express myself fully in every medium I like and this is a perfect first step. 

It was definitely stressful. Especially because I’m super scared of being perceived as cringe. Like, I always was a shy child (at least inside my own mind and self perception) but I also always loved performing on a stage. And I truly miss performing – even though it turned me into an anxious mess every time I had a play. But not only the play itself made me nervous, every single time I was participating in rehearsals or other group activities related to acting I went home more sweaty than after my sport sessions. It’s truly wild, I liked it so much. 

Probably this is exactly the thrill I need in my life. Very safe, but still nauseating, painful nerve wracking. :’D

It’s truly fun tho. 🙂 Here’s the link to the first video I published: 

The thrill got me and I’m still going. That’s why here is my current one, half a year later:

I very much enjoy the process of creating these vlogs and surely will continue. But I absolutely have to upgrade my quality. I’d appreciate recommendations especially regarding mics or lights. 

See ya & thanks for checking out my videos!